Reintegration, Weekend 1: Partial Success with a Twist

After our meeting at Edgewood, the one thing that we all seemed to agree on was that D needed to ultimately live with her mom (even if neither of them are ready for it yet). The way to do that is baby steps.

The plan: D would be taken out of her home on Saturday, to spend the day with her mother and I.

• I’ll be honest, the day went great.
• No real issues for the entire day. We did some misc things together, like check out that new computer super-center that just opened (I know, I couldn’t help myself).
• 6pm rolled around and it was almost time for her to go back. I had left to pickup Chinese food so we could all eat a meal before we had to take her back.
• When I came back to the house, it was World War 3. Evidently, D had waiting until I was gone to attack her mother.
• J wanted me to take her back instantly, but I wanted to eat.
• So we ate, everyone grumbled, and we proceeded to leave.
• D refused to get in the car, and I threatened her with calling the police.
• J and I also agreed (in front of her), that if she did not go back, she would lose her Thanksgiving trip to see her family.
• Eventually, she got in the car.

The car ride back was very insightful, as D and I generally get along well as long as its just the two of us.

• One of the main issues surrounding this situation is that no one every really gives her a straight answer. So I feel for her in that regard. I don’t like, and I don’t mask the truth. I tell it like it is.
• So i gave her the opportunity to ask me any questions she wanted and I would give her honest answers.

[Note: HUGE Shocker on the way.]

“Why does my mom continue to take me out and just drop me back off when its convenient for her?”

• Quite the contrary, I explained to her about the meeting that we just had. The goal was reunification, and the way to do that was by bringing her out slowly and watching how she interacts with her family. The only thing sending her back was her own behavior.
• The longer the good behavior lasted, the longer the next visit would be.
• In the particular case, the roof blew at about 8 hours. So maybe next week it would be more, maybe it would be less. We would talk to her councilors about that.

[Wait for it, it’s almost here]

“I don’t want to live with you, I want to live with my grandmother in Washington”.

• We tried that, it failed. You assaulted your grandmother on several occasions, one of which is what landed you here.

“You aren’t giving me a chance to show you that I’ve changed. ”

• In fact, we are. Every time we take you out is a new chance to show us that your behavior has improved. Today your behavior was great, tonight, you reverted.

“Well, like I said, I am going to live with my grandmother in Washington”

• Then why hasn’t that happened yet?
• If S wanted to, you would already be living there. What do you think is stopping her?

[Here it comes..]

“S does think that I’ve changed. She and I went to look at apartments and houses in Washington last weekend.

[BOOM - Hiroshima]

Honestly, I was floored. Where do you go from here? But I did my best:

• She was probably just trying to placate you. I’m sure you harassed her continuously, so she did what she had to do to keep you quite (a reoccurring problem all of D’s life, actually).
• Now I was curious:what time did you guys go look at apartments?

So when did you and S look at apartments? “We drove around after she picked me up from K’s house.”

[BOOM - Nagasaki]

The one person we all agreed that she should not be seeing. The 40 year old ex-drug addict, ex-convict woman, which D is currently idolizing as a “cool mother figure”. Wonderful.

So just to recap. S has not only completely undermined everything WE all agreed to do, but she lied to us by trying to hide it.

J confronted her about it the next day, and J claimed that her expression was shock. Not in the fact that it wasn’t true, but in the fact that D had told me. Evidently, D had told a lot of people. The councilors at the school already knew this at the meeting we had on Tuesday. They just assumed we knew also.

Her response? “Well did D also mention that we looked at other apartments in other areas also?”

Let me be as clear as possible about my next few words: WHO GIVES A FLYING FUCK? You took a child with a severe obsessive addiction and you feed her the heroin that she had been craving.

Can S possiblly be that ignorant and stupid of a woman?

The answer is yes.

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